"Disappointing"

"Sometimes the words you need to hear the most hurt the worst."  

You know how there are some people in your life you pray you never disappoint.  I know I have several in my life!  Anyway, during a conversation a little over a week ago with one of them my eyes were opened to just how many excuses and road blocks I let get in my way.  The word "disappointing" sliced my heart in two, but then I thought maybe I hadn't heard it correctly or in the right context, or maybe I didn't hear it at all.  That was just a defense mechanism (I have a few of those) to not recognized that the word WAS really spoken and that it was real and honest, but loving and encouraging all at the same time.  Now some people wanted to know if I was "ok" when I posted the above quote on my FB page and I definitely was.  In fact, I thanked this person for snapping me out of the "poor me" slump I'd fallen in to and I recognized that no matter what happens during the day there is no excuse for not taking care of yourself.  I myself have said "I don't have time" is just an excuse, because depending on your priorities, you will MAKE time for things that matter to you.  The words I speak SAY getting healthy and fit are important to me, but my actions prove otherwise and I needed to reevaluate myself and my daily life and figure out what to do differently.

Don't get me wrong, I have never ONCE lied to anyone or posted any fabrications on my blog.  Everything here is real and happened and I've never denied eating horribly a few days or said I worked out when I didn't.  It's just not my nature, but I DID make excuses and that's just as bad.  So for the last week I've taken two days off (Friday and Saturday) of working out but otherwise have MADE time.  Most days it's been after the kids go to bed no matter how utterly exhausted I was from the day.  Some days (like today) I made it to the gym in the early morning hours because that worked better for my schedule.  Either way, I've had some great workouts lately and am making wiser choices about the fuel I put in my body.

This morning for instance I did a WOD (including a portion of the bonus core stuff and then followed that up with 35 minutes of cardio on the eliptical....oh and did I mention I have a horrible chest cold that has my lungs burning and Albuterol fueling my workouts as well....BLECH!  But it's just a road block and one I will get past.

My picture won't post (thanks Blogger!) Anyway here's what my workout consisted of this morning:

27-21-15-7 of the following

Pullups - I did them on the TRX

Pushups - I did mine on the TRX

Walking Lungers - I did mine with a 12 lb ball in hand and adding a twist on the lunge

Bonus was 100 leg lifts w/hip thrusts - I'm not quite to that level of badassery so I did 30....still was hurting afterward....oh and followed up with 35 minutes on the eliptical.

So for all of the people who have held back on telling your loved ones that you are disappointed or let down to save their feelings....just know that it's all about how you say it and as long as you approach the subject with love and respect and still stand as a support system for them, you are doing the right thing.  I thanked my loved one for helping me snap out of it and anyone that hears the LOVING words of disappointment should at least evaluate themselves....chances are if you are letting other people down, you are letting yourself down too....Time for a change.